The Simulacrum

~Chapter 146~ Part 2

The night was short yet tiring.

No, that wasn't some kind of sneaky innuendo about how I was engaged in the ol' matrimonial polka with Judy all night. In fact, after watering down The Girl's sudden appearance with some additional mind-bending discussion and a rather hilariously bad movie I kept in talon for an occasion like this, she went home without any further hiccups.

That was the beginning for me. Since the princess did her best to stop me from 'working', in a very broad sense of the word, I had some catching up to do. I started by checking on our potential antagonists with Far Sight, but there wasn't much to see. The assassins were still locked up tight under the local School, the Chief Directors were still under house arrest and (Savir unsuccessfully trying to pull some strings notwithstanding) on their best behaviour, while Crowey and his posse were currently still trapped in a stalemate with the other Abyssal noble houses and couldn't respond to the news of Tajana's Fauns getting captured.

In other words, the most likely sources of hostile plot developments were all inert at the moment. Of course that didn't rule out the possibility of a new bad guy entering the scene from behind the curtains, but without a Plot (and Narrative-me pulling the strings behind the scenes), a surprise villain showing up at this point was highly unlikely.

Following that, I also checked on my friends, allies, and acquaintances (in that order), but there wasn't much to see there either, so I soon moved on to other, more material matters. After Phasing over to the underground base, I had a late evening discussion with the homunculus team, and we agreed that, now that the proverbial sword of Damocles was no longer hanging over our heads and we had some leeway, there was no longer any need to rush the project. As such, the expected completion of the body was pushed back by almost a month, but in return, Peabody and Fred promised me that they would provide me with an amazing end result. Whatever that meant when it came to homunculi, I wasn't entirely sure, but I took their words for it.

As for Sahi… we'll get back to her later.

Anyhow, once I was done with that, I holed up in the corner of the main workshop dedicated to the enchanting tables, and I spent most of the night working on artifacts, big and small. Those had a habit of piling up on my desk, both in the literal and figurative sense, as my expertise was not only in demand for the homunculus project, but many of the other Research Division members would send me artifacts for examination or tuning up with specific requirements in mind.

Most of it was easy, routine work related to projects I gave them. Repairing Oaths, manufacturing new Knight equipment, researching Chimera magic immunity and Josh's weird powers and how they could be put to practical use, stuff like that. Yet, there were others that made me wonder what some of our mad scientists were cooking up in their workshops. I had a feeling that another surprise inspection was in order, lest we would have another mini-shoggoth incident on our hands. Not that Pudding-kun hadn't proven his usefulness since then, but that's beside the point.

Much more importantly, there was a very specific artifact I prioritized, and it ate up most of my night. By the time I finished and checked the clock on my phone, it was almost eight in the morning. Sheesh.

"Like, you're totally pulling too many all-nighters."

Blinking, I turned to the brown girl wearing a white lab coat. She was working on something on a workbench not too far from mine, her hair tidied up into a large bun and her eyes focused on the round brass plaque in front of her. It kind of looked like an old-timey astrolabe, but instead of the stars, it had a version of the Vitruvian Man etched into its surface. It was also subtly glowing, meaning it was another artifact, one that I hadn't touched yet.

"I'll have all the time in the world to sleep when I'm dead," I answered jokingly, and she let out a soft huff without looking up. In fact… "Wait… Are you still sulking?"

"I'm totally not," she denied it, but if anything, it only made her sulk harder.

"No, you totally are," I spoke absently as I pocketed the finished artifact on my bench and fully turned to her. "Are you still mad about what happened on Monday?"

"Mad? Like, why would I be mad? Did you do something that would totally make me mad?"

"No, but when you're pouting like that, trying to deny it like this is kind of silly," I pointed out, and she finally looked at me.

"I'm not mad, I'm just… Argh! Gag me with a spoon!" She threw her hands into the air, giving up all pretences, and glared at me. "Like, last time, I totally missed fighting a dragon, but it's like, fine! She's like totally a kid, so it's fine. But then this time you not only had, like Colossi, but Angie went like totally Deus-mode too! Like, seeing either one of those would've been totally wicked, but you didn't even think about calling me! That's just sooo bogus!"

"… You know, most people usually don't throw tantrums for not being called into an active combat zone."

"Most people are lame," she responded swiftly, only to then hastily add, "Also, I'm totally not throwing a tantrum!"

For a seventy-something-year-old grandma, she was pretty childish, wasn't she? I would've liked to believe it was her young body influencing her mind, but then I remembered how she acted before her permanent transfer and… Some people just remained young in spirit, huh?

Anyhow, after stomping her feet to emphasize that she definitely wasn't throwing a tantrum, she crossed her arms and huffed with the kind of schoolgirl-indignation that completely fit her apparent age.

"Next time, make sure you call me!"

"Next time what?"

"Like, next time when a totally legendary existence of the World of Mystics shows up! Like, what's the point of being young and powerful," she paused and brought out a pair of her semi-transparent magical hands, probably for illustration, "if I don't get to use them?"

"I think we're kind of running low on legendary existences though," I pointed out, but she just put one hand on her waist and made a weird wave with the other, mirrored by the magic hands behind her.

"Like, who are you trying to fool, Leonard? Didn't we just confirm that Bel of the Abyss is totally the Abyssal Emperor?"

I eyed her for a while, and seeing that she was entirely serious, I slowly shook my head and responded with, "Fine. If we ever fight Bel head-on, I'll call you."

"Wicked!" She flashed a daredevil grin at me and then flexed a bicep with her other hand resting on top of it. In other words, she struck the Rosie the Riveter pose, and her summoned hands once again mimicked the gesture behind her. "I'll totally show him what's what! Just you see!"

"Yes, yes."

Despite my unenthusiastic response, Sahi continued to grin at me right until I bid my farewells and left the workshop with meandering steps. Seriously though; why was I surrounded by weird people wherever I went? Was I something of a weirdness-magnet? I knew that normal people with normal motives and normal aspirations existed in the Simulacrum, so why was it so hard to meet them?

While pondering so, I went through the usual route and routine. I said hi to Brand and the Fauns, I checked out the morning exercise of the Ordo Draconis Squires and finally arrived at the reception room with the teleport closet. Without further ado, I Phased over to my next destination, and before long, I was standing on the balcony of a familiar apartment building in Lorci.

"L-Leonard!" I only needed to knock once, and Michael was already frantically trying to let me in, fumbling with the glass door of the balcony. "You should've told us you were coming!"

"What? Is Admin here?" another voice came from further inside, and Moose poked his head into the living room. He had a mug in one hand and a croissant in the other, meaning he was probably just eating breakfast in the kitchen. "Let him in already."

"I'm doing that!" Mike whined and finally managed to unlatch the door, allowing me inside. "H-Here you go."

"Thanks. Sorry for showing up out of the blue like this, but I have some business with Michael."

"With me?" the hapless Celestial muttered, his expression vacillating between expectant and anxious.

"Really?" Moose spoke absently as he fully walked in, wearing fluffy slippers and an equally fluffy bathrobe over a metal band t-shirt. His long hair was also a bit messy, so he probably got out of bed not too long ago. He finished up his small croissant, and after swallowing it, he absently scratched his head. "I thought you would be here for a status report."

"Is there anything to report on?" I asked, one brow raised high, and after some thinking, he shrugged.

"No, not really. Things are going smoothly."

"Suspiciously smoothly," Mike added, earning him a frown from the big guy.

"I told you there's nothing suspicious about it. People have been waiting for Polemos to put his feet down, and they are just doing their best to please him now that he did." He glanced back at me and added. "By the way, did I tell you that 'I told you this would happen' yet?"

"Not today, no," I responded just a touch sourly, and the guy grinned at me.

Ignoring his attitude for the time being, I had to admit that I shared Mike's apprehensions about everything going too smoothly in the Elysium. I knew that Tsephanyah had already prepped the Reformist faction to curry favours with me and prepare for reforms (it was a bit of a 'nomen est omen' kind of situation, now that I thought about it), but even the Unorthodox faction had thrown their full weight behind me, and as for the Orthodox… Those guys were just weird.

The majority of them were still entirely loyal to Savir, yet despite our numerous and well-documented clashes, both in private and in public, they proclaimed their loyalty to me as well and somehow saw no conflict of interest there. Not just that, the current consensus in the Elysium wasn't that 'Polemos got fed up with the Directorate's shit and clamped down on them', but that 'Polemos found the Directorate too inefficient, and he's now reorganizing it to make it better'. Hell, according to Judy's deep dives into the Celestial Hub's forums, the prevailing sentiment wasn't that I made a power-grab, but that I found the Chief Directors lacking and I was perfectly in my right to teach them a lesson.

Seriously. The average Celestial's pseudo-religious zealotry was creeping me out a bit.

But putting that aside, things were finally getting to the point in the Elysium where I could try enacting some proper changes, so one of these days, I would have to go in there and decide what to do with the Directorate and the three head honchos once and for all. I was already booked by Naoren for today though, so for the time being, I moved the entry a bit higher on my new and improved mental priority list, only to then put it out of my mind with a shake of my head.

"We'll get back to Celestial business another day. For now, I have other things to attend to, and more importantly," I turned to Mike and gestured for him to come closer. "I have a mission for you."

"Y-Yes! I'm ready to serve! Your wish is my command, and you command is… also my command, I think!"

Despite his spirited words, the guy's expression was anything but enthusiastic. If anything, he looked afraid. Just what exactly did he think I would ask of him, I wondered.

"Stop looking like I'm about to tell you to invade the Abyss on your own and listen to me." Channelling my inner Polemos did the trick, and he immediately stood straighter. Reaching into my pocket, I fished out a ring and pressed it into his palm. "Give this to Amelia for me."

"A r-r-ring?!"

The blonde Celestial's eyes opened wide as saucers as he stared unblinking at the small, silver metal band in his hand. It was made of stainless steel, lacking any frills or plating, but because it was polished up a bit, it still looked pretty good. It was one of the 'practice rings' I got Galatea to make me when I started working on the real deal that I gave to my girlfriends. Since it already had the right base enchantment on it, I only had to tailor it to the class rep's specifications. It still took quite a while, and it wasn't as solid of a job as the ones on my girlfriends' fingers (those took about twenty work hours, each, not counting the time dilation in the enchantment-space), but it was good enough.

"Lord… I mean… Leonard… I mean…" Mike stuttered and sputtered like an old two-stroke engine running on badly mixed fuel. "W-We aren't really… erm… Our relationship isn't quite t-there yet, but if you command it, I will—!"

"This isn't an engagement ring," I cut him off before he could get more worked up.

"O… Oh?"

Seeing the utter confusion on his face (and the absolute amusement on Moose's), I rubbed my forehead and gestured with my other hand for Mike to listen closely.

"I'm sure you've noticed, but I've been consulting with Amelia regularly over the past couple of days."

"Y-Yes?"

"She asked me for a defensive artifact the other day, but if I just gave her a ring, it would not only lead to misunderstandings, but it would also be wildly inappropriate."

"Right…" At last, a light of understanding bloomed in his eyes, and he nodded. "So you want me to deliver it to her?"

"Exactly."

"So… it's not you commanding me to get engaged with her."

"Do you seriously think I would give you an order like that?"

"N-No!" This was the point when Moose couldn't hold back his chuckles anymore, and Mike glared at him. "Raz! Stop it!" He hastily faced me again, and added, "I just wanted to make sure there wasn't a misunderstanding! That's all!"

Sighing, I dismissed him with a wave of my hand.

"Whatever. She'll know what this is about." I sent a quick glance at Moose to see if he had anything to add to the conversation, but he was too busy trying not to laugh at Mike's expense, so I concluded my visit with a flat, "I'll come by one of these days and we'll have a proper talk. Carry on."

With that, I turned around, walked out to the balcony, and placed a foot on the railing. My cover story had always been that I flew here while hidden by my Celestial Illusion magic or whatnot, so the guys in the living room didn't even bat an eyelid when I disappeared from their sight. Normally I would've Phased right home, but seeing Moose scarf down that croissant made me a little peckish, so I first stopped by a local pastry shop I sometimes visited when I was in the neighbourhoor.

All in all, that diversion took about ten or so minutes, and then I was ready to Phase back to my room… except I noticed something peculiar when I got ready to do so, and I ended up amending the destination into my house's dedicated teleport closet instead.

The moment I opened the door, I was welcomed by a loud 'A-ha!' from the living room.

"There's the criminal!"

Blinking, I closed the door behind me and levelled a rather unamused stare at the Celestial girl kneeling backwards on the couch and pointing an accusative finger at me.

"Hi, Angie. What are you doing here this early?"

"We came over to play," her boyfriend, also sitting on the couch noted as he looked over his shoulder. "You weren't home, so Lily let us in."

"That's not important!" Angie declared with an over-exaggerated huff. "You must answer for your crimes first, traitor!"

She clearly wasn't serious, but I couldn't quite figure out what she was on about. At least until I noticed a familiar main menu song coming from the television, and I connected the dots.

"Is this about the game console?"

"Well, duh!" she responded and pointed at the white box under the TV. "You had a next-gen system in your living room, and you never told us about it! This is treason of the highest order!"

"Easy there, dumdum," Josh chided her with a hand on the top of her head, and then pushed her down into a more normal sitting position, just in time for me to circle around the sofa.

"I'm not a dumdum! You're a dumdum! And this is serious!" she sulked, and after falling silent for a few seconds, she slouched her shoulders. "Aw. Not even Grandpa is on my side!"

Whatever Deus had told her had completely dispirited her, and I didn't quite know how to react. I still needed some time to acclimate to this whole 'Angie-has-the-literal-man-in-her-head' situation, so for the time being, I focused on Josh.

He was wearing a hoodie and jeans, and looked perfectly healthy even though his left arm was still in a sling.

"How's your injury?" I asked without reservations, and he shrugged, looking just a touch tired.

"Itches like a bitch, but I'll live." He glanced at his shoulder and circled his head in place of a shrug. "In retrospect, I got damn lucky that I wasn't shot in a vital spot, or this would be even more annoying."

"It wasn't luck, but chosen one privilege," I noted jokingly, and he rolled his eyes.

Choice of words aside, it was good that Josh's shoulder was healing. While we knew it from the start that the bullet the belligerently French assassin used to snipe at them was a specialized anti-Celestial armament, it took us a few days to realize just how absurdly tenacious it was. Its ability to specifically pierce Celestial Barriers was obvious at a glance, and so was its capability to hinder healing Hymns, but as it turned out, it was even trickier than that. Case in point, while Celestial healing magic could be used to close the bullet wound, after its lingering effects dissipated, the curse carried by the bullet would 'unwind' the effect and cause the hole to open up again.

Luckily, this specialization also played to our advantage. Just like how the Magiformer's wards were effective for absorbing most of the bullet's impact, Magi healing spells could also work around the curse. It wasn't a perfect solution, but it still meant that Josh's injury would take a couple of days to heal instead of a couple of weeks.

Of course, I could've sidestepped that whole issue by just getting rid of the curse, but it was embedded into Josh's records the same way it happened with Emese's old wound. While I no longer had any 'plot device' designations to hold me back, I had to admit, I've been a bit squeamish about touching souls ever since the retcon, so I decided to just let the curse dissipate and Josh's wound heal on their own.

"Just rest a lot, and you'll get better soon," I told him off-handedly and got ready to sit down, but stopped when I saw him wince. "What?"

"You know, my wound is the least of my problems right now."

"… Do tell," I prompted him, and my friend responded with a sigh through clenched teeth.

"I'm worried about Bel of the Abyss. He's not only dangerous, but he now knows about…" He glanced at Angie, then at his own chest, and then back to me. "You know? The whole soul-sharing thing? It just makes me feel uneasy."

"Don't worry about that."

Despite my best efforts to reassure him, my words had little effect on him. On the other hand.

"Right! Don't worry, Josh! We've got this!" Angie declared with entirely unfounded confidence and pumped a fist. "Even Grandpa Deus says so! We beat him last time, so we can just beat him again!"

At first, I wanted to point out that I was pretty sure Deus and Polemos didn't 'beat' as much as 'tricked' Bel of the Tenebrous Flames, but this wasn't the right time for that. Especially when Angie immediately moved on and pointed at me.

"So let's stop worrying about him, and figure out what to do with this traitor in our midst!"

"Are you still on about that?" Josh blurted out, mirroring my sentiment, and his girlfriend exhaled a confident hum.

"Of course! We're fire-forged comrades! How dare he keep his console a secret from us?"

"Technically, it's Penny's console, not mine," I pointed out, and she dismissed me out of hand.

"Hum! Semantics!"

I was just about to ask if they even got permission from my sister to use her game console when I realized something. Or rather, the distinct lack of something.

"Speaking of which, where's everyone?"

"Lily said they went to the mall to buy some new clothes for that woman living in your guest room. Tatiana, I think?"

"Tajana," I corrected him, and I just belatedly realized that her dot wasn't nearby either. I hurried Far Glanced at her, and to my mild surprise (and relief), I found her window-shopping with my sisters and Morgana on a relatively busy in-doors shopping aisle.

Now that I thought about it, after the muffin-incident the other day, Snowy asked me in provate if we could 'loosen the leash' on Tajana, so to speak, and while I gave her my blessing, I didn't think they would start by arranging a shopping trip right away. Still, she was surrounded by three trustworthy individuals, so I doubted she'd try to run away. Who knew? Maybe Snowy's plan to have her switch sides wasn't far-fetched at all.

"Don't change the subject!" Angie exclaimed and pointed a controller at me. "Grandpa Deus tells me you always do that when you're at a disadvantage, and that I shouldn't fall for it. Now, pick up your weapon, and we shall duel!"

By weapon, she probably meant the aforementioned controller, and when I took it from her, she let out a theatrically sinister chuckle and grabbed the other one that came with the system. I looked at her, then at Josh, and finally connected the dots.

"So all of that was just to get me to play with you?"

"My fingers aren't back to one hundred percent," Josh commented a touch sheepishly. "I'm not quite fighting-game ready yet."

I wanted to point out that we could play something less button-mashy, but then I saw him smile at his excited childhood friend, and I swallowed back the words. He was obviously indulging her by not getting in the way, so who was I to throw a wrench in that? I was free until noon anyway, so we had lots of time to try out the other games Penny bought for the system later.

As such, I flashed a daring smile, pressed 'Start', and after picking our Super Bash Siblings characters, I… lost four matches in a row. Did I ever mention I wasn't that good at this particular game?

Oh, who cared! It was a Sunday morning, and three friends were playing video games and having fun together. That was good enough.