The Simulacrum

~Chapter 158~ Part 1

Day two of our vacation started well. Without any pressing matters to attend to, we all slept in and then had a hearty breakfast. Our dishes were delivered from the kitchens of the top chefs of the nearest tower and were made using authentic ingredients grown in the Elysium only. Or at least that's what Mensah told me. He also arranged for an impromptu visit to a nearby farming village for us to partake in some kind of traditional spring fair. While it wasn't in my original plans, it sounded interesting enough, and the girls were eager to take a closer look at Elysian culture.

Say what you will, Mensah was consistently dedicated to the whole 'let's kickstart the Elysium's tourism industry' idea. That was… fine, I guessed. Better to be obsessed with something harmless like that than Savir's compulsive scheming.

Speaking of her, we hadn't seen her all morning, and every time I Far Glanced at her, she was holed up in her bungalow. She didn't make any contact with her agents either, I made sure of that, so she (probably) wasn't plotting anything at the moment. Though with her, one could never be sure.

As for the last member of the Elysian Three Stooges.

"We're off, kids! See you in the evening!" Dad-in-law yelled in high spirits and waved to us over his head.

He was in the company of Tsephanyah, Arnwald, and Clarke, so… let's just dub them the 'dad group'. They were all decked out in fishing equipment and in the process of climbing onto a carriage on their way to a certified top angling spot. The rest of us were also invited, but everyone had their own plans, so we divided into multiple smaller parties.

The aforementioned 'dad group' left in high spirits to potentially catch some fishes. On the other side, we had the 'training group', headed by Josh and accompanied by Angie, Penny, and the three mothers. The latter were mostly there because Morgana wanted to see the Celestial training facilities, and the other two were just tagging along with her to chat.

That left the rest of us in the 'cultural exchange group'. While technically I was in charge of this one, it was spearheaded by Mensah. He took care of the details, so we only needed to gather at the same place where we disembarked the day before and wait for our ride. There was still about half an hour until then, so I was hanging out around the beach for the time being and making observations.

Such as the scene unfolding nearby, between the departing training group and my Abyssal sister.

"Whatever happens, be careful! Don't wander away from the group, and make sure you're never alone with that Mensah guy!" Penny insisted while holding onto my other sister's hands, like a nervous mother sending her daughter to college. "I don't like the way he's looking at you. If he tries anything, just knock him out and run, and let Brother sort it out afterwards!"

"It's going to be fine," Snowy insisted, but it didn't stop my Knightly sister from squeezing her hands like she never wanted to let her go.

"Penelope…" Morgana whispered as she stepped up to her and gently unclenched their hands. "Neige can take care of herself. You're worrying too much."

"N-No, I'm not! I just care about Snowy. As a sister. Because sisters are supposed to care for each other!"

"Right." My other sister smiled at her. "You should make sure not to get hurt during training too."

"Ah, don't worry! I'm in top shape!" Penny declared and struck a bodybuilder pose, eliciting a series of chuckles from the group.

"All right, everyone. Please pay attention," Josh raised his voice a bit further back and waved his hand over his head to signal for everyone to gather around him. "Not everyone here can fly, so we'll head out on foot. It's not too far away, but we'll be walking in the open, so make sure you put on your sunscreen."

"I've got spares!" Angie chimed in, holding a small basket full of colourful tubes.

While that side was preparing to set out, the dad group already boarded the carriage and left the shore. The rest of the cultural exchange group was also gathering up nicely, with one particular member drawing my attention right away.

"A-hoy!" Sahi yelled with an ear-to-ear grin and skipped over to my side. "Are we leaving yet?"

"No, not yet," I responded with a steadily deepening frown. From top to bottom, she had her hair in fluffy twin-tails, wore a bright yellow tank top that was tied up at the front to show off her midriff, and denim short shorts along with a pair of bright pink beach flops. "Are you planning to come like that?"

"Like, what's wrong with my outfit?" she asked back innocently, and I didn't know where to even begin.

"I told you that we're visiting one of the farming villages for a traditional spring celebration. They're modest people, so I don't want to give them a culture shock."

She was looking at me like I just told her that the sky was purple and put her hands on her hips.

"Like, come on, Leonard! Don't be a prude! This is totally modest!"

"I can literally see your belly button!" I told her, only for a sudden and curious realization to hit me out of the blue.

Homunculi weren't supposed to have belly buttons, were they? At least, that's what Peabody told me, and he was as close to an authority on the subject as we could find on the island. In fact, now that I thought about it, Pascal was wearing a shirt even when he went swimming, and the class rep never wore anything more revealing than a light sundress either. I imagined they were hiding their lack of navels, but it never hurt to ask. As luck would have it, the opportunity to do that presented itself right away.

"Is there a problem?" armband guy asked as he came over to see what our argument was about.

"Like, listen to this, Paz! Leonard says that my clothes are too revealing to appear in public! It's totally bogus, right?"

Pascal gave her a flat stare and then adjusted his round glasses as he turned to me.

"Is that so?"

"Yes," I stated solemnly, and he let out a soft grunt.

"I will see what I can do about it."

Then, without any prior warning, he picked up the rejuvenated arch-mage in his arms and turned on his heel.

"Eeep! P-Put me down! This is no way to treat your elders!"

"Are you not my cute underclassman?" he asked back in a level voice that nevertheless sounded really cheeky. Meanwhile, Sahi swung her legs so hard it was a miracle her flops remained on her feet, yet at the same time she was also hugging Pascal's neck with all her might.

"Not at times like this! This is totally lame! Put me down!"

He didn't listen to her, and the two of them soon disappeared into their designated beach house. It was only at this point that I realized I forgot to ask him about the navel problem, but he wasn't the only one who could answer me.

"We're here!" Elly, flanked by Judy and Ammy on each side, threw her hands into the air and yelled from a fair distance away, as if afraid that I would leave without them.

All three of them were dressed infinitely more sensibly than Sahi, sporting polo shirts, sundresses, and other staples of summer casual wear.

"Lord Barnabas is coming soon," the class rep told me, and on closer look, I was surprised that I couldn't see her Grimoire Keys anywhere. That is, until she took off her sunhat to use it as a fan and I saw that they were sitting on the top of her head. She apparently gained a little bit of control over their movements over the past few days. Good for her.

"No hurry, we aren't late from anywhere." I waited for them to settle down, and then I casually asked, "Hey, class rep? Do you have a belly button?"

There was a long beat of silence, followed by my dear assistant exhaling a sigh.

"Chief. That's sexual harassment."

"In what universe?" I snapped at her and then turn back to the class rep. "So?"

"W-Why's the sudden interest?" she asked back, and I ultimately resigned myself to an explanation. Seriously, why can't anyone just answer a simple yes-or-no question?

"Because Sahi has one."

"Yes, Chief, it's part of a girl's anatomy. I thought we were over this," Judy continued to heckle me, so I did the only rational thing in this situation and mercilessly tickled her sides until she stopped.

Once she was no longer squirming, I handed her over to Elly and faced the class rep again.

"I hope it's not a touchy subject. I was just curious because, you know? There's that whole homunculus business."

"F-For your interest, I do have a navel," she finally spilt the beans, though she sounded strangely indignant about it.

"Okay, just checking."

In retrospect, it made sense. If a homunculus was supposed to fully pass as a human in society, there was no reason why they couldn't have been grown with a cosmetic belly button. If it was possible to alter their appearance, general body structure, or even give them extra limbs while they were in the vats, something like this was probably child's play. One more mystery solved.

While I was mulling over this, Sahi finished changing and returned with a much less skimpy outfit consisting of a t-shirt, proper shorts, sneakers and a baseball cap. They also had one more person in tow, and Lord Barnabas was hard to miss, considering he stuck out of the group like a sore thumb. He was still wearing formal attire, and while he ditched his cape, his outfit was anything but summer-wear.

"Aren't you hot?"

"Thank you for your concern, but I'm fine," he responded politely, and yet he pulled on his collar at the same time. Was he being cheeky, I wondered. "I'm using temperature-regulation magic."

"Oh, that sounds cool. No pun intended." On second look, there truly was a faint, hazy glow around him, it was just hard to see in direct sunlight. "Can I take a look at it later?"

"I'm afraid it's a spell, not an enchantment." He flashed an apologetic smile and wiped his forehead. "It also isn't easy to maintain it. Without Ley-lines to draw upon, our spells are greatly diminished in potency."

"Right! It's totally annoying," Sahi huffed and puffed, seemingly completely over our previous disagreement already, and muttered a few lines of faux-Latin to summon her magical hands. "Look! Like, this is my limit here! If I tried to summon more, they would totally lose cohesion! I feel totally lame."

"Now, now, don't be disappointed." The dark-skinned arch-mage flashed a doting smile at the girl and bent over to inspect one of the floating hands. "Being able to so naturally maintain a mana construct at your age is already quite remarkable. You shouldn't sell yourself short."

"Hehe! Thanks, Uncle Barnie! You can praise me more!"

"Oh, you rapscallion."

The two of them laughed in unison, completely unaware of the pensive expression on the class rep's face.

"Excuse me, but what do you mean by 'without ley lines'?"

"I… thought that was straightforward," Barnabas told her after a brief pause.

"Yeah, it's such a pain," Sahi backed him up with a huff. "Everything takes so much effort! It's a good thing we've never invaded this place, or we would've been totally wiped!"

"Could you please not bring up such dangerous subjects in the open like that?" Pascal scolded her at once, but she just stuck out her tongue at him without a shred of self-reflection.

On the other hand, Ammy was even more confused.

"But… The Ley-line is right there," she said, pointing at a nearby hill. "It's very stable too."

"Where?"

The three Magi all turned towards the spot, but their expressions only got more and more confused over time.

"I'm afraid I can't sense any Ley-lines over there. Are you certain?"

Ammy nodded at Barnabas, and explained, "I was surprised how evenly distributed and firm the local Ley-lines were when we first arrived. I thought everyone was just holding back because we were guests here, but… Do you really can't sense them?"

Pascal shook his head, while the other two were still staring at the hill, prompting the class rep to look at me. It took me a few seconds to realize she was expecting me to add my five cents, but I had to disappoint her.

"Sorry, but I'm no Magi, so I don't know the first thing about Ley-lines."

"Is that so?" Her tone said she wasn't buying it (even though I wasn't selling anything), and sidled closer to me. She whispered, "And what about a 'destiny' kind of perspective? Do you think this might be significant?"

"Maybe," I granted her with a shrug and pointed at the two marbles sitting on the top of her head. "It could be related to those things."

"Hmmm…"

While Ammy was musing about that, and the Magi were still trying to stare the nearby hill into submission, our small group gained one more member with the arrival of Michael.

"S-Sorry, I'm late!" he sputtered the moment he landed next to us, clad in a military uniform. "Father insisted that if I were to accompany you in public, I should dress properly, but we couldn't find anything in my size, so we had to—"

"No problem, you aren't late," I cut him short before he could work himself up any further. "We're still waiting for Snowy and the kids, and Mensah isn't here yet, so you're good."

"Oh. Thank goodness." The guy let out a relieved breath, and as if just realizing that his girlfriend was standing next to me, he abruptly straightened his back and put his hand on his chest. "So? How do I look?"

He topped that with a cheesy smirk that still looked annoyingly charming on his unnecessarily handsome mug. As for the target of said question, Ammy's expression bloomed into a delighted smile, followed by a couple of soft giggles.

"Very dashing."

"Hehe. You're also really charming today. I like the thing you did with your hair."

"Oh, you noticed?"

Blinking, I glanced at the bashful class rep and couldn't help but wonder what she meant. Her hair looked the same as usual (save for the two magic orb thingies on top of her noggin), so I had no idea what they were talking about. And I prided myself on recognizing changes in hairstyles; they were narrative indicators of importance, after all.

Yet, no matter how much I squinted, I didn't see anything special going on. As such, I had to conclude that it was either some kind of inside-joke, or it was just garden-variety flirting.

"Oh, get a room, you two," I said as I pushed Ammy over to Mike's side, and she frowned over her shoulder at me.

"That's rich, coming from you," she snapped, but then as soon as she linked arms with the guy, she was all sunshine and rainbows again.

Anyhow, since the spot at my side opened up, the girls immediately took it, and for the next ten minutes or so, nothing interesting happened (other than Judy trying to take revenge by ticking me back, but that was neither here nor there). Finally, the last members of our group arrived, with Snowy leading the Celestial kids by the hand. She changed into a sundress since the last time I'd seen her, along with a large straw hat even bigger than the one the class rep was wearing the other day. As for the children, they were back in their little togas again.

"Are we late?" she asked, and Elly responded with a shake of her head. "Oh, good. I thought we were late."

I was about to gesture to them to come over, but then Judy tugged on my sleeve to get my attention.

"What's that?"

She was pointing at the sky, and when I squinted, I could see something rapidly approaching us. After about a minute, I could finally make out the details, and let out a groan.

"Please stay out of the landing zone!"

Mensah's voice echoed over us via magical sound amplification. He was standing on top of a palanquin the size of a small bus, held up in the air by about a hundred burly Celestials, and I would've questioned his safety if I didn't recall that he had wings too. Didn't make him look any less silly though.

At last, our mode of transportation descended onto the flat ground next to us, and the ex-director floated off the top with a bit of theatrical fare.

"Please, step inside, and we'll be on our way!"

Since everyone was rooted in place, it fell on my shoulder to break the ice, so I walked up to the palanquin and hissed, "You're overdoing it," to Mensah.

"With all due respect, Lord Archon, our esteemed guests deserve nothing but the most luxurious mode of transportation Elysium can offer. Don't you agree?"

"No. The most normal mode of transportation would've sufficed, but…" Looking at the eager Celestials waiting for his signal to carry us into the air again, I let out a sigh. "Since it's here already, I guess we might as well board it."

Mensah grinned like a well-fed cat and ushered everyone inside one by one. The interior was covered in red velvet and silk curtains, with rows of spacious seats inside, like an old-timey first-class passenger train car. All in all, it was surprisingly normal. It could've been worse.

Once we settled down, the carriage slowly rose to the air, providing a rather spectacular view of the fields and towers of the Elysium. I've seen it more than enough times from the top of the Migdál, but for most of our group, it was a novel experience. Even the kids, who should've been familiar with the sight, were 'Oooh!'-ing and 'Aaah!'-ing at the windows.

On a side note, said windows didn't have any glass. There was some kind of barrier present, which stopped the high winds from blowing us out of the cabin, but otherwise, the palanquin was open, which made me hold Judy closer to me, just to be safe. Unlike the rest of us (including the Magi), she couldn't just fly off or break her fall in case of an emergency.

After a few minutes, Mensah entered the carriage through one of said windows (once again reinforcing that they were a bloody safety hazard) and after getting his hair in order, he walked over to me and gave me a ceremonial bow before presenting me with a magical tablet thingie.

"I have taken the liberty to make arrangements for you and our esteemed guests, so that you could enjoy your visit at the early kheimónthéra to the fullest."

I had no idea what the last bit meant, but simple logic dictated that it referred to this fair or festival or whatever we were about to visit. The tablet was bothering me more, so I snatched it out of his hand and gave it a closer look. It only made my brows furrow and my mood darken.

"Dolion?"

"Yes, Lord Archon?"

"We aren't doing this," I told him on no uncertain terms, and while his smile wavered for a second, it didn't crack.

"But everything has already been prepared for your arrival, and following the schedule is the most optimal way to experience the festivities among the—"

"We're not here to be 'optimal', we're here to experience the local traditions and have fun. This…" I flicked a finger at the tablet in my hand, making the screen scroll and revealing even more text. "This is worse than one of those guided group tours scummy companies use as a front to sell useless crap to old people looking for a cheap trip."

"I… don't quite understand the analogy, but rest assured that I curated everything ahead of time, and there should be no useless… erm… anything today."

I was just about to get properly annoyed and raise my voice, but in the meantime we were already getting close to our destination, and Elly tugged on my hand to get my attention.

"Look, Leo! It's like a carnival!"

Even from this distance, I could see thousands of Celestials filling the streets of the small farming village. It had less than a few dozen buildings, so such a crowd looked really out of place here. Most of them were gathered on a field near the village itself, where lines of colourful tents and stalls were erected, along with stages surrounded by wooden scaffoldings and various other attractions. Even from this distance, it all looked very… artificial. Like one of those renaissance fairs that tried really, really hard to look authentic, but it was also trying to be a big spectacle at the same time, so it all ended up very performative.

That wasn't want I was expecting, and I was just about to sternly object when Snowy let out a startled cry.  By the time I looked over, one of the Celestial kids had already jumped out the window, and the other was hot on her (or his; I still had a hard time telling) heel with a panicked, "We need to do something!"

For a second it looked like Snowy was about to follow after them, but then she realized they were flying, and she let out a relieved breath.

"What was that about?" Judy asked, and my sister seemed just as bamboozled as the rest of us.

"Uuu… They saw the fair down there, and then said something about trumpets, and… you saw the rest."

We landed shortly after that, and by the time I got out of the palanquin, the two little Celestials were already bossing everyone around left and right.

"No, you can't have those! The Lord Archon doesn't like trumpets! He's going to be mad!"

"Put away the flower petals! Quick, before the Lord Archon sees them!"

"Ahhh! No, get up! Don't bow like that! The Lord Archon will scold you for that!"

"Act natural, act natural! Everyone, pretend like everything's normal!"

"No, no, no! No horns either! Nothing that blows!"

Normally grown adults wouldn't have obeyed their every word, yet the flustered crowd was following their instructions like their lives depended on it. Just because they came out of our carriage and were acting like they owned the place. Such a beautiful display of Refuge in Audacity was nearly bringing a tear to my eyes.

"You see, Dolion?" I said and handed the tablet back to the flabbergasted ex-director. "You could learn a thing or two from them."

Offering my arms to my girlfriends, a giggling Elly and an amused Judy took my sides, and we walked down the ramp towards the rapidly changing festival grounds. It was time to exchange some culture.