The Simulacrum

~Chapter 155~ Part 1

The first day of the pre-spring break exam period was… rough.

Oh, not because of the lessons, or the test papers. Sure, my academic performance was less than stellar due to all the various incidents and official duties getting in the way of my studies, but I was still doing fine. I probably wasn't going make it onto the honour roll this time around, but so what? So long as my girlfriends wouldn't be ashamed of me, I was going to be fine. On the other hand…

"It's unfair!"

Seeing his girlfriend throwing a fit, Josh rolled his eyes and linked arms with her to keep her at bay.

"Tone it down, silly squirrel."

"I'm not a squirrel! And I'm not silly either!" she hissed back at him, but after some cuddling, she calmed down a little. Managing one's significant other's mood was an art in and of itself, wasn't it?

Anyhow, the three of us were standing by the shoe lockers near the school's entrance, and while momentarily placated, the fairer half of the childhood friend duo continued to fume. And glare. Mainly at me.

"I'm still mad at you!" she declared and pointed a finger at me, as if it wasn't abundantly clear already. "How could you leave me behind yesterday and go to the arcade without me? I was stuck at home and studying all day, thinking that Josh was undergoing some cool training montage like in the movies, but you were out having fun without me instead! I wanted to hang out too!"

"We'll have plenty of opportunities to do that during the spring break," I told her in an attempt to placate her, but it had little effect.

"But then we'll be training for real! Running up and down stairs and punching bags is not the same as playing!"

"We got you the panda plushie you wanted though," Josh pointed out. "Can we catch some slack in exchange for that?"

"Well, yeah, that was sweet of you and all, but… but…"

Seeing that the other half of our group was coming down the stairs, I decided to put an end to this discussion by gesturing for Angie to come closer.

"Let me tell you a secret."

"Secret? What secret?"

Despite her earlier tantrum, she hopped closer without any apprehensions, dragging Josh along. The guy accommodated her with a stoic expression, and once she was next to me, I leaned in and whispered directly into her ear.

"We're not only going to train during spring break. Make sure you pack a swimsuit."

"Hm?" Her eyes lit up at once, but then they clouded with confusion. "In this weather? Where are we going to—?"

I put a finger in front of her lips.

"I told you, it's a secret. Just remember that there's going to be plenty of opportunities to play."

I could practically hear the gears grinding in her head, but then the proverbial lightbulb lit up over her noggin and she flashed a toothy grin.

"Got it!"

"What are you whispering about?" Judy asked as soon as she reached our side. She was followed by Elly and my sisters, and our two groups quickly blobbed together.

"Oh, you know? Secrets, ploy, clandestine schemes and arrangements. Those kinds of things."

"Yeah. Celestial stuff!" Angie declared with the same grin, and she was closer to hitting the nail on the head than she could've imagined.

My dear assistant nodded in acknowledgement, while Penny in the background cocked her head to the side and whispered a confused, "Really?"

"Nah. We're just horsing around," I told her before addressing the whole group. "I have some business to take care of, so let's meet up later."

"It still feels so weird to have a study session without Ammy," Josh noted on the side, and his girlfriend wholeheartedly agreed.

"Right! We really, absolutely, categorically need her brains for this operation! Especially for math!" She turned to me with pleading eyes. "Are you sure she can't come over?"

"Lord Grandpa and the other arch-mages are super-protective of her right now. I barely managed to convince them to let her come over to the base to train, and they only allowed it so long as I vouched to keep an eye on her all the time."

"But didn't you leave her with us the other day? When you went away with Ms Yamako?" Josh asked the inconvenient question.

"What they don't know, can't hurt them." I tried to sound as profound as I could, but the childhood friends just squinted at me in unison, not letting it go. "It just can't be helped, okay? Bel has appeared in the Dracis mansion multiple times, so they are uncomfortable letting her come to our study meeting."

"If that's the problem, then why don't we hold the meeting in Haven?" Snowy proposed on the spot, but the princess immediately interjected.

"That won't do! I already told our chef in the morning that we would have guests over, so they're making homemade snacks for us."

"Uuu… That's a toughie…" Angie groaned and pulled her arm out of Josh's grasp, only to hold her hands up like the pans of a balance scale. "Snacks, or Ammy? Ammy, or snacks? Uuu…"

"We're going to do this every day until the end of the exam season," I pointed out a tad impatiently. "We can just invite her over tomorrow."

Hearing that, Angie dropped her left hand and declared, "Snacks it is!"

"Like it was ever in question," Josh quipped on the side, and it swiftly replaced the grin on his girlfriend's face with a pout.

"What is that supposed to mean? Are you saying I'm a glutton who cares more about sweets than friendship?"

"No, I'm simply insinuating that your thought processes are highly economical when it comes to calorie intake," he said with a straight face, and Angie blinked in utter confusion.

"Insinu… economical…" She suddenly let out a guttural noise and grabbed his boyfriend. "I can use big words too, you know? I'm reading way more difficult books! You're not fooling me!"

"No, you're not! I'm reading your books too, to help you understand, dummy!"

"I'm not a dummy! You're a dummy! You're the dummiest dummy who ever dummied!"

While the childhood friend couple descended into yet another customary lovers' quarrel, Judy sidled up to me and tugged on my sleeve to get my attention.

"Yes, Dormouse?"

"Are you leaving to deal with official matters or unofficial ones? Wink, wink."

"… Saying 'wink-wink' is not a substitute for actually winking," I pointed out, but she just continued to stare at me, waiting for my answer. "The unofficial kind."

"Good luck with that." She glanced around and then gestured for me to lean closer. Was she doing it just to imitate Angie, I wondered. Once I did what she wanted, she whispered, "I picked a nice pair. Look forward to it."

I blinked in surprise, which then turned into mild concern when Elly in the background gave me a thumbs up and declared, "Me too!", proving that Judy was bad at whispering. Case in point…

"I don't get it," Penny muttered with question marks circling her head. "Do you get it?"

"No, I don't think so," Snowy answered a touch timidly, so before they could get any more intrigued, I straightened my back and gestured for them to get moving.

"Let's go, guys, and see you later."

"Sure," Judy responded blandly and… she winked at me?

As in, she closed one eye without any other muscle in her face making as much as a single twitch. It was almost impressive in its uncanniness.

"So you can wink after all!"

"Hush, Chief." She put a finger on my lips, and solemnly stated, "Winks are a limited resource. They should not be squandered thoughtlessly."

"Hold on, you two," Elly interrupted us by literally wedging herself between us. "No 'skits', or whatever you call them today! The last time you got so lost in one we nearly missed dinner."

"That was the exception, not the norm," Judy responded with just a hint of a pout but quickly relented. "You're right. See you later, Chief."

She rose to her tip-toes, which was the universal signal that she wanted a kiss, so I planted a peck on her lips. Then did the same for the princess, because it was only fair. In the meantime, Josh and Angie resolved their argument and I waved the group goodbye before heading into a nearby restroom on the ground floor. Some things were a constant in life, such as that toilet stalls were still the most convenient spots to Phase to and from in school, and after switching to my Polemos outfit, I promptly disappeared from the campus.

"Ah, Lord Archon!"

The automatic door slid open less than a second after I arrived in my personal suite in Migdál Glaukós, and in walked a middle-aged Celestial woman with shoulder-length black hair. Adva Tira, the newly appointed Speaker of the new Celestial government, and an all-around weirdo who was apparently waiting outside the door for my arrival.

"Thank you for gracing us with your presence once more!"

She was looking at me with zealous eyes, and if not for me raising a hand to stop her, she would've genuflected to me right then and there, despite me specifically telling her not to do that. Multiple times.

"Hello, Adva. Please tell Acacius that I arrived and I'm requesting his presence."

"Yes, at once, O Lord Arcon! I shall inform Sumboulos Tsephanyah at once! If necessary, I'll drag him here myself!"

"That won't be necessary. He should be expecting me." She eagerly nodded, so now that we were on the same page, I asked, "By the way, what were you doing in front of—?"

I was too slow. Before I could finish even half of the sentence, she was already out of the room. Stifling a groan, I walked over to the sofa near the windows, sat down, and waited for Tsephanyah to show up. Oh, and that 'sumboulos' thing? Maybe it shouldn't have surprised me, but the newly formed government of Elysium insisted on giving the three ex-directors some fancy archaic titles, because 'advisor' was too plain and it was tradition and whatever. It wasn't the only such change in nomenclature, but more on that later.

Since I explicitly told Tsephanyah that I would visit the Elysium today, I expected him to get here soon, and just like I predicted, it only took him a few short minutes to arrive.

"Good day to you, Lord Polemos," he greeted me as he walked in with hasty steps, not even bothering to knock.

He was wearing the same Greco-Roman toga as usual, though he was conspicuously missing the laurel crown as of late. I never bothered to ask, but if my hunch was correct and this really was his transformed Celestial form, then his 'demotion' might've had something to do with it. Today wasn't the day I would inquire about it either, as we had bigger fishes to fry.

"I have delivered the Sumboulos, as instructed, O Lord Archon!" Adva chimed in from the back. "Do you require anything else of your humble servant?"

I'm not going to lie, her eagerness creeped me out a bit, but she was helpful, so I smiled at her warmly and said, "No, thank you."

"T-T-There is no need to thank me, O Great Polemos, Lord Archon, glory to your name! It was my pleasure to serve! Please, never hesitate to command your loyal servant!"

See? Creepy.

Anyhow, after repeatedly bowing, she finally left the room and I could focus my attention on the blonde ex-director.

"Come, sit."

I gestured at the other sofa around the coffee table, and I didn't have to say it twice.

"I have not heard of any sanctioned crossing into Elysium today. Have you entered through your… unique methods?"

"Yes. It was faster this way."

Tsephanyah's brows furrowed deeply.

"I'm certain you're already aware, but your manifest usage of such… illogical powers has already left a stain on your reputation."

"I know, I know. I'm planning to hold a press conference before the end of the week to put a lid on the rumours. Send someone qualified from here to attend as well; I'm sure the members of the Congregation would also like to hear the details."

The wrinkle between his brows grew ever deeper, and he emphatically responded, "The members of the Synderion, yes."

I locked eyes with him, and let out a soft, mildly annoyed breath.

"Sure, Synderion."

His expression eased up and he smiled with satisfaction. Long story short, while I wasn't looking, the current governing body of the Elysium, formerly known as the Celestial Congregation, unanimously decided that their official title wasn't fancy and ancient Greek-y enough, and petitioned to have it changed. Since I couldn't be bothered with it, I just gave them the go, and they decided on 'synderion', which from what I could gather literally just meant 'council' or… wait for it… 'congregation'.

More relevantly, they have used this as the foot in the door to request all the other sensible government offices and titles to be fancied up with ancient Greek and Latin terminology. Sometimes it almost felt like they were doing it just to annoy me, but then every time I approved one of these changes, they would praise me for it like I was the one who came up with the idea. If I didn't know how zealous the average Celestial was, I would've suspected there were oodles of sarcasm involved, but I digress.

"Are you also aware of the situation unfolding in the Abyss?" he asked, and it sounded like even he thought it was just a rhetorical question.

"Of course."

I wasn't lying. I've been occasionally keeping an eye on what was happening down there, and it didn't look too good. Crowy went on a power-trip out of nowhere and declared himself the Herald of the Emperor, demanding that all other noble houses in the Abyss would surrender and subordinate themselves to him. More troublingly, he was doing well. Too well even, and despite being grossly outnumbered, his forces were matching the alliance of the other noble houses tit for tat, occasionally pushing them back even.

Some of that was due to him crippling many of the stronger houses by a surprise attack right at the start of the war, but maybe the biggest contributor was the man himself. He somehow got an enormous power boost, probably from the Mana Wells, and, it took multiple other Abyssal Lords just to keep him occupied whenever he showed up in battle, which not only wreaked havoc in his adversaries' chain of command, but also wasm't good for morale.

It was a sudden development, and while I couldn't be one hundred percent sure, it had future-me's fingerprints all over it. The whole situation looked like an enormous pain in the neck, so I hoped I knew what I was doing.

In any case, after hearing my answer, the ex-director nodded like it was self-evident.

"Dolion has been urging us to continue expanding the military and forming alliances with the other forces in the World of Mystics in response."

"I know. He's been talking my ears off about it every chance he gets."

"I imagined as much."

He said that, but his expression said he was expecting me to give a proper response. I didn't have to, but I didn't want to make things awkward either.

"For now, I want to adopt a cautious approach. It's obvious that Bel of the Abyss is behind these events, so I want to ascertain the level of his involvement before making any over moves."

That mostly satisfied him and he uttered a soft, "As the Second True Archon sees fit."

Again, under other circumstances, I would've expected that to be sarcastic, but he sounded like he absolutely meant it. Shaking away my misgivings about everyone's sincerity in this bloody pocket-dimension, I linked my fingers in my lap and sat straight.

"Let's not beat around the bush any longer. How's the project I entrusted upon you coming along?"

"The construction is already underway, and we've already gathered experienced operators from the CID and the military." He was referring to the Celestial Intelligence Division, the parent organisation of the Celestial Intelligence Network. Maybe due to their connection to me as Admin, but they managed to not only weather the reorganization of the government, but the renaming frenzy as well. "According to the latest estimates, everything should be completed ahead of schedule, including the additional facilities you requested."

"Good. Anything else to report?"

Surprisingly enough, there wasn't much. Things were proceeding smoothly on the surface, and even when someone (read: Dolion) would complain that there were more important things to worry about, when push came to shove, everyone was doing their best to bring my plans to fruition.

I wasn't going to lie; I felt like I could get used to this. Me giving orders I thought might be unreasonable, and people jumping at the opportunity to do it and complete the task anyway. Of course, that was a slippery slope, and I didn't want to end up some kind of petty dictator, so I tempered my urges and was simply happy that things were proceeding well for once.

We also discussed a few other topics, mostly boring political bits and pieces about the running of the new government and its growing pains. Before I knew it, two hours passed and it was high time I caught up with the rest of the gang. As such, I politely kicked Tsephanyah out of the room…

"Lord Polemos, listen to me. As  your Sumboulos, I implore you to consider this carefully. A parade at this time would help lift the spirits of—!"

… for a good reason.

"No, no, and no," I growled and literally pushed the ex-director through the door. "No more parades, and that's final. Goodbye."

I triggered the door and it closed before he could get another word in, and I let out a groan from the bottom of my lungs. Just what was it with Celestials and their obsession with parades, I wondered. One thing was for sure; I wasn't going to find it out today, and once I was alone, I changed back into my school uniform and Far Glanced at my destination. It was a quiet little nook in the Dracis neighbourhood, and the place I often used when I wanted to visit but I didn't want to Phase right into the estate.

Once I locked in the location, I immediately disappeared from my home away from home in the Elysium and arrived at—

"Heyo!"

"Whattheshithewhothefuck!" I exclaimed in mind-numbing shock when someone casually addressed me from behind and turned on my heel so hard it dug into the lawn under my feet. It took my brain a few seconds to fully process what just happened, but then I automatically (and angrily) threw my arms in the air. "Bloody hell, man! Don't startle me like that! I almost punched your lights out by reflex!"

"I know," future-me responded jovially. For once, he wasn't wearing his… our Bel costume, opting for the kind of simple street clothes and long coat I used to wear a lot in the past. He smiled at me and pointed at his feet. "That's why I'm standing over here, and not in arm's reach."

"That… makes sense," I admitted, if grudgingly, and waited for him to step up to me. "So? What's the occasion?"

"I'm just here to drop this off." He nonchalantly reached into his coat and handed over a pocket notebook. "Give it a good read."

"What's this?" I opened it, and after skimming a few pages, my confusion only grew. "Seriously, what's this?"

"A list of things I've done and will do." He sounded disinterested, almost annoyed.

"… Do I have to memorize this to pass it down to past-me when it's my turn to do the retcon?"

"Nah, you just have to retcon yourself already remembering it all. It's easy," he answered off-handedly and flicked the notebook in my hand. "It's just for convenience. This way, we're on the same page, and the rest of the plan would proceed more smoothly."

"Actually, what is the plan?" I muttered as I took another look at the contents of the notebook. "Wait, I did that? I mean… will have done that? And… that too? Hold on, are you seriously telling me that we're…?"

I wanted to glare at future-me, but he left without as much as saying goodbye. Man, what a jerk. Or… since we're the same person, am I a jerk? Maybe I should use this opportunity to self-reflect and better myself, so that—

"No, I can't do that," I blurted out. "If I do that, I won't be a jerk in the future and that will cause a time paradox…"

Feeling a headache coming, I pocketed the notebook, only to pause, take it out, and place it into the storage array housing Cal and Teeny instead. There was just enough free space for small objects like this, and it would be safer there. Now, where was I? Oh, right.

"Maybe I should reflect after the retcon in the future? Or maybe I already did, and future-me's just acting this way to preserve the time-space continuum?" I pondered quietly as I started walking, but before long, I concluded it all with an exasperated, "Time travel sucks."